Retro gaming today feels like a vibrant flea market where nostalgia is the currency, and everyone’s bartering for pixelated memories. The cartridges you blew into as a kid are now museum pieces selling for the price of a used car, while CRT TVs—those big, boxy beasts—are treated like ancient artifacts from a lost civilization. It’s as if the gaming gods decreed, “Thou shalt not emulate,” leading purists to hunt for original hardware with the fervor of Indiana Jones searching for the Holy Grail. Meanwhile, Millennials and Gen Xers proudly display their modest retro collections, only to have Gen Z ask, “Wow, is that an NFT?” No, young one, that’s an N64.

But retro gaming is also thriving in the quirkiest of ways. Speedrunners are breaking records on 30-year-old games, while modders give Mario the ability to wield a lightsaber or, inexplicably, turn him into Shrek. Modern re-releases and mini consoles cater to the “conveniently nostalgic,” though good luck finding an NES Classic without signing over your soul (or at least your Netflix subscription). And let’s not forget the arcade renaissance, where grown adults spend their evenings competitively button-mashing to Pac-Man, fueled by overpriced craft beer and a burning desire to relive high school glory days. Retro gaming isn’t just alive—it’s a chaotic, pixel-packed soap opera, and we’re all here for the drama.