All posts by Metal Jesus Rocks

Sierra Stories with Metal Jesus Rocks – The Retro Hour Podcast

Retro Hour Podcast catchs up with  ‘Metal Jesus Rocks’ – a YouTube sensation and former Sierra On-Line employee. We hear about his recent reunion with the legendary Sierra team, reminiscing about the glory days of one of the most iconic companies in PC gaming history. Jason shares behind-the-scenes stories from his time at Sierra, from wild office parties to the transition from accounting to game testing, and his passion for big-box PC games. Plus, we get the inside scoop on his memorable retro road trips, favourite game room treasures, and what’s next for his channel as it nears a million subscribers!

Gamestop Retro – So Bad its Scary

Radical Reggie visits GameStop Retros to see if the hype for retro games was really there. I was shocked.

GameStop is like that distant uncle who still wears cargo shorts and talks about the glory days of Blockbuster, refusing to acknowledge that the world has moved on. You walk in, and it’s an odd combination of excitement and mild sadness. Shelves are filled with used games that look like they’ve seen more action than your average Marvel movie marathon, while a teenager in the back is trying to trade in a stack of 20 games, only to be offered enough store credit to maybe buy a stick of gum. The place is a treasure trove for the nostalgic, but also a glaring reminder that digital downloads have basically karate-chopped physical media in the face.

The staff, bless their souls, are the gatekeepers of all things geek. They can tell you the plot of The Last of Us backwards while simultaneously trying to convince you to pre-order something, even though you’re just there for some Mario-themed socks. The store somehow feels like the last stand of a forgotten era, clinging to relevance with Funko Pops and energy drink displays. You’ll leave with a lighter wallet, a new game you probably don’t need, and a lingering feeling that GameStop is less a store and more a quirky time capsule with a serious gaming addiction.

PAX West Hightlights – New GAMES I’m excited for! (Nintendo, Atari, Indies)

Highlights from PAX West in Seattle. Lots of new games from Nintendo, Atari, Capcom, etc… plus indie games and more. –> WATCH >> https://youtu.be/Sz5eN4JTZwI

PAX West in Seattle is like Comic-Con’s geeky cousin who’s into video games, Dungeons & Dragons, and has way too many Funko Pops but somehow still manages to be cooler than you. As you step into the expo, you’re greeted by a sea of flannel shirts, obscure gaming references, and more LED lights than your average spaceship. It’s the only place where arguing about the best Final Fantasy game can last for hours and somehow, both sides are still wrong. And don’t get me started on the cosplay—there’s everything from a near-perfect Master Chief to a Pikachu that looks like it’s seen some things.

Navigating the expo hall is like leveling up in a video game—each booth is a mini-boss encounter, from indie developers pitching their latest pixel-art platformers to massive companies showing off shiny new tech. If you’re lucky, you’ll leave with enough swag to build a small nerd shrine, though the real loot is the random stickers, pins, and tote bags you’ll find months later in your backpack. By the end, you’re emotionally exhausted, a little poorer, but filled with enough gaming news, demos, and nerdy conversation to last you until the next PAX (or at least until you finish your current Steam backlog…in 2035).

BUILDING A STAR WARS ARCADE MACHINE IN MY HOUSE!!

Carly King unboxes and assembles the Arcade1Up Star Wars arcade cab.

The Star Wars arcade game released in 1983 is like stepping into a time machine that teleports you directly into the cockpit of an X-wing—but with graphics that look like they were designed on an Etch A Sketch. It’s a classic relic from a galaxy not so far away, where the cutting-edge technology of the day meant wireframe graphics and joystick controls that required the reflexes of a Jedi and the patience of Yoda.

When you first approached the machine, it was like encountering a giant, glowing monolith that practically dared you to put in your quarters. The cabinet was decked out in artwork that made you feel like you were about to go on an intergalactic adventure. Once you sat down, though, you quickly realized that the “adventure” consisted of staring at a screen filled with green lines, which somehow represented TIE fighters, turbolasers, and the Death Star.

The controls? Oh, the controls. The joystick was this chunky, plastic thing that felt like it could withstand the force of a Wookiee temper tantrum. It didn’t just move; it clunked into place as you tried to aim your blasters at tiny, geometrical ships that looked like they were drawn by a very ambitious kindergartener.

But once you got into the groove, the game had you hooked. The famous lines from the movie echoed in your ears—”Use the Force, Luke!”—as you navigated the trench run on the Death Star, which was essentially a series of rectangles and trapezoids flying toward you at warp speed. The sound effects were top-notch for the time, with digitized blaster shots and that familiar “pew pew” that made you feel like you were really in the heat of battle.

Surviving long enough to blow up the Death Star was a badge of honor. You’d walk away from the machine with a sense of accomplishment, as well as a slightly sore wrist from manhandling that joystick. And if you really nailed it, you’d get to hear Obi-Wan Kenobi tell you, “The Force will be with you, always,” which was basically the arcade equivalent of a mic drop.

In short, the *Star Wars* arcade game of 1983 was a glorious, low-res homage to the greatest space opera of all time. It was the ultimate test of skill, endurance, and the ability to pretend that a bunch of green lines were actually spaceships. And for those who mastered it, it wasn’t just a game—it was a way of life.

FOUND 1981 Ferrari 512 BB sitting for over 30 years

Peter discovers a beautiful 1981Ferrari 512BB with super low mileage that has been sitting untouched for decades! However this means it also hasn’t been maintained or serviced..he must negotiate a fair shake with the car’s owner in order to get his hands on this one. After taking it back to the shop, Gary is able to take it for a drive before Bill Wallace comes to take a look at it for a customer of his.

The Ferrari 512 BB is like the automotive equivalent of a rockstar from the ’70s—loud, wild, and unapologetically flashy. It’s the kind of car that doesn’t just turn heads; it practically snaps necks.

First, let’s talk about that design. The 512 BB looks like it was sculpted by someone who had a poster of a fighter jet on their wall and thought, “What if we turned this into a car?” With its low-slung body, pop-up headlights, and a rear end that could double as a launch pad, it’s the kind of ride that screams, “I’m fast, and I know it.” The name alone—”Berlinetta Boxer”—sounds like it should come with a pair of aviator sunglasses and a leather jacket.

Under the hood, or rather behind the seats because this is a Ferrari after all, you’ve got a 5.0-liter flat-12 engine. It’s like they crammed an orchestra into the back of the car, and every time you hit the gas, it’s like the conductor just told the brass section to go nuts. The roar of the engine is so intense, it’s like the car is constantly clearing its throat in the most aggressive way possible.

Driving the 512 BB is an experience in itself. It’s not the kind of car that politely asks you to steer; it demands that you hold on for dear life and enjoy the ride. The steering is heavy, the clutch requires the leg strength of a small bear, and the visibility? Well, let’s just say you’re better off focusing on what’s in front of you because whatever’s behind you is already a blur.

But here’s the thing—the 512 BB doesn’t care about your comfort. It’s not here to pamper you with cup holders or Bluetooth. This is a Ferrari from the days when driving was a full-contact sport, and every trip felt like a victory lap at Le Mans. You don’t just drive this car; you wrestle with it, and if you’re lucky, it lets you feel like a hero.

In the end, the Ferrari 512 BB is the kind of car that makes you want to grow a mustache, put on a pair of flared jeans, and blast some classic rock while you tear down the highway. It’s not practical, it’s not subtle, but who cares? It’s a Ferrari, baby—and it’s here to remind you that sometimes, the best things in life are the loudest, most ridiculous, and utterly thrilling.

Star Wars Outlaws Review – “A New Hope” or “Holiday Special”?

Star Wars Outlaws is like that moment when Han Solo realizes he owes Jabba the Hutt way too many credits—but stretched out into an entire video game. Set between The Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, it introduces us to Kay Vess, who is basically the galaxy’s coolest new smuggler since, well, the original smuggler. She’s got a knack for getting into trouble, but luckily, she’s got a loyal companion, Nix—a little creature that’s part dog, part ferret, and all adorable. Think of Nix as the Chewbacca to Kay’s Han, only furrier and with fewer growls.

The game lets you explore the underbelly of the Star Wars universe like never before. You’ll be flying around in your own ship, pulling off heists, and making morally questionable decisions—because what’s a good outlaw without a little ethical flexibility? Imagine all the stuff Luke, Leia, and the rest were too busy with the whole “saving the galaxy” thing to do, and that’s what Kay’s up to. It’s like they took the Mos Eisley cantina and made it a lifestyle.

This is ACG’s review of the game and performance.

I tried using a Mac for 2 years. Here’s my review.

Long-term MacBook Pro review after 2 years of use.

The Apple MacBook is like the Starship Enterprise of laptops—sleek, shiny, and ready to boldly go where no computer has gone before. Just like the Enterprise, it’s a finely-tuned piece of technology that makes you feel like you’re in command of your own personal starship.

First off, the MacBook’s aluminum body is as smooth and polished as the hull of the Enterprise itself. When you open it up, the screen lights up like a warp core powering on, ready to take you to the farthest reaches of the digital universe—whether that’s exploring strange new websites or conquering the vast expanse of your email inbox.

The keyboard? It’s like the control panel on the bridge—every key precisely engineered for efficient navigation through your tasks. And with that satisfying click, it’s like you’re giving orders to the ship’s computer, which, in this case, is Siri (the ever-patient Starfleet officer who never questions why you need to know the nearest pizza place at 3 a.m.).

The trackpad is your command center, as intuitive as using a tricorder. Swipe, tap, and zoom with the precision of Mr. Spock calculating the odds of successfully completing the Kobayashi Maru. And let’s not forget the MacBook’s battery life—it’s the closest thing we have to dilithium crystals in the 21st century, keeping you powered up for hours, even when you’re light-years away from an outlet.

And when it comes to speed, the MacBook’s M1 chip is like Scotty in the engine room, delivering warp speed performance even when you’ve got more tabs open than a Klingon battlecruiser. Multitasking feels as effortless as Kirk sweet-talking his way out of a tight spot.

Of course, just like the Enterprise, the MacBook isn’t immune to the occasional hiccup—whether it’s a software update that feels like a Romulan cloaking device has activated, or a spinning beach ball that’s as dreaded as a malfunctioning holodeck. But these moments are rare, and your MacBook is usually as reliable as Data running a diagnostic.

In short, the MacBook is the perfect blend of form and function, with a little bit of Starfleet flair. It’s the laptop you’d choose if you were captain of your own starship—or at least the one you’d want while pretending to be. And as any good captain knows, sometimes it’s not just about getting the job done; it’s about doing it with style.

The Immortal John Hancock in Brazil!

The Immortal John Hancock got the honor to attend Retrocon in São Paulo, Brazil and had a blast!

São Paulo, Brazil, is like the over-caffeinated cousin at the family reunion—loud, bustling, full of energy, and impossible to ignore. It’s a city that never sleeps because it’s too busy figuring out how to squeeze 24 hours’ worth of activity into every 12-hour day.

First off, São Paulo is enormous. If you think your daily commute is long, imagine traversing a city that seems to have its own gravitational pull, sucking in everything and everyone within a 50-mile radius. You could probably fit several European countries in there and still have room for a football match.

The traffic is a whole adventure in itself. Navigating São Paulo’s streets is like playing a never-ending game of Tetris, where the blocks are other cars, buses, and the occasional motorcycle zipping by at warp speed. It’s the city where being “fashionably late” is a way of life because, honestly, there was no way you were getting there on time anyway.

But São Paulo is also a city of contrasts. One minute you’re walking past skyscrapers that make you feel like you’ve accidentally stumbled into a “Futurama” episode, and the next, you’re in a leafy neighborhood where time seems to have slowed down just long enough for you to enjoy a leisurely coffee—probably the strongest, richest brew you’ve ever tasted, because in São Paulo, coffee is not just a drink; it’s a lifestyle.

The food scene? It’s like the United Nations on a plate. You can eat your way around the world without ever leaving the city. From sushi to pizza, to Brazilian barbecue that’ll make you question your life choices, São Paulo has it all. Just be prepared to roll yourself home after indulging because portion control is clearly a foreign concept here.

And the people? Paulistanos are the kind of folks who can juggle a dozen different things at once while still managing to look effortlessly cool. They’re friendly, direct, and have a knack for making even the most chaotic day seem like just another Tuesday.

In a nutshell, São Paulo is a wild ride—a chaotic, vibrant, electrifying metropolis that’ll leave you breathless, a little bit lost, and definitely craving another shot of that amazing coffee.

I was WRONG about the PlayStation Portal…

The PlayStation Portal is like a gaming Swiss Army knife that forgot its blades at home but still insists on being the life of the party. Imagine taking a PlayStation 5, shrinking it down to tablet size, and then realizing, “Oh wait, this thing can’t run games on its own.” It’s essentially the gaming world’s equivalent of a long-distance relationship—you’re technically together, but you need a strong Wi-Fi connection, or things get frustrating fast. The Portal is perfect if you’ve ever wanted to game on your couch without hogging the TV, but still need your PS5 to do all the heavy lifting. The PlayStation Portal is a lovable paradox: advanced yet oddly limited, freeing yet tethered, and definitely a conversation starter.

Buy PlayStation Portal (Amazon) : https://amzn.to/3MfEXqH
(As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases from affiliate links)

Doug DeMuro – Are Electric Cars Dead?

Today, I am discussing the death of electric cars.

The rise in popularity of the electric car is like watching your quirky, eco-friendly neighbor suddenly become the coolest person on the block. You know the type—the one who composts religiously, rides a bike to work, and has a solar panel collection that could power a small village. One day, they rolled up in a sleek, silent vehicle that looked like it had just been beamed down from a UFO, and everyone else started to notice.

At first, the idea of an electric car was met with skepticism, like it was a fad only for the overly enthusiastic tree-huggers or tech geeks. “It’s quiet,” they said, “like a golf cart on steroids.” People worried about running out of battery in the middle of nowhere, stuck next to a tumbleweed with only their regrets and a fully charged smartphone.

But then something wild happened—people actually started driving these things. And not just the environmentalists. Regular folks realized, “Hey, this thing goes from 0 to 60 faster than my morning coffee kicks in!” Suddenly, it wasn’t just about saving the planet; it was about showing off your new gadget that didn’t sound like a lawnmower with a hangover.

Charging stations started popping up like Starbucks locations, and soon, seeing an electric car on the road was as common as seeing a pigeon in a city park. Now, everyone from soccer moms to speed demons is in on the electric car game, and they’re all loving that moment when they pull up to the gas station and just… drive past it with a smug little grin.

In the end, the electric car’s popularity isn’t just about going green—it’s about going fast, saving money, and having a really good excuse to avoid small talk at the gas pump. And maybe, just maybe, it’s also about the thrill of feeling like you’re driving the future today.